Confronting is a Good Thing

Growing up I saw my parents fight all the time but I never (I'll give'em the shadow of a doubt and say rarely ever) saw my parents apologize to each other or extend forgiveness. My sister and realized this in high school and thought it strange that we went to church every sunday but we had no idea what forgiveness really looked like or what it means to "drop it" like really not have anything between us any more because of forgiveness. 

I learned a few years ago that when Jesus died on the cross that was God putting all my sin on Jesus, that was God putting all my Dad, Mom, brothers and sisters sins on Jesus, and double more wow was that Jesus' death was enough to cover not only people who will be saved but every ones. And then on top of all this He rose from the grave to conquer sin and death and then made our lives extra better by not just being willing to take our punishment for sin but to turn around to us and be our best Friend! What the heck? What? Who does that? I mean really.

God does that. Why? Because He wants to have a good relationship with His creation! But we look up at Him and scoff "I don't need You! I can do just as good as You, if not better!" And He knows better that we are human and He is  THE only God, and He STILL wants a good relationship with us. So instead of striking us all down (which is what we deserve) He sent Jesus to take our/my place of punishment. When  God the Father looks at those who have accepted Jesus (His Son) as Savior and Lord He treats us with the same love a Father gives a Son. Like freaking awesome!

So something I've learned in the past years is the way to not repeat my parents marriage is to lovingly confront my friends when I've wronged them or when they've wronged me. And do it ASAP!!! I always have to pray and talk to Daddy God about the situation and repent of anything I've done against Him and then the next step is to go find that friend and either tell them Hey I've wronged you and made our relationship awkward or strained, I was wrong. Will you forgive me? OR I need to go to that person and say Hey this happened or you said this, and I took it that way. Is that what you meant?

Confronting/confessing my sin against others is hard, but there is a peace that comes with putting everything out into the open, putting all your cards on the table - nothing hidden, and not allowing the sin to separate a friendship is so great! Confronting a sin in another is hard too. I guess the scariest thing about confronting/confessing is that fact that you don't know how the other will take it! They could be gracious and work with you or they could totally blow you off and you just lost a friend. When the friend is gracious your friendship just got stronger!

If I ever get married it will be to a man who is my friend, practicing apologizing and reconciling with my friends now will help in married life. 

Not easy at all but worth it! Even on the flip side if the friend doesn't work with you with grace in a situation God calls us to live with peace with every one as far as it depends on us. So if they won't give grace but you've apologized and forgiven what you need to forgive and repent to Jesus, then you're good to go.

See Matthew 18:15-35